Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It's just like the Real World with babies
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
So many bounce houses so little time
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
