im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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