8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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