Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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