I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
