try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize