how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
