I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
