If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize