I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize