Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
