she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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