Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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