this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
