Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
