I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
pray to the hookup gods
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize