i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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