Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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