i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
