it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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