I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize