I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He better not be in your backpack
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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