she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
