Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
