if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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