The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
