On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
