Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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