I think i sorta joined a cult last night
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
