Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
