Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
sarcasm needs its own font
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
