Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
