we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
