Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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