Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
