I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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