I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
