DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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