he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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