Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
