I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
if only i could text you this smell
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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