remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
