Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
