All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
