dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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