Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
