So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
It's Friday. Sex?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
