He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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