That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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