Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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